Dear sis, as you are planning to go into marriage, packing bags upon bags, please leave a ‘bag’ for these 10 must-haves. You’d need them more than a gas cooker or a washing machine in your Christian marriage.


It is important that you learn to extend love to people around you, even the difficult ones because you might meet someone who has that kind of personality when you get married-maybe your neighbor or church member or even sister-in-law. I am not talking about the emotional ‘I fell in love’ thing. No. I am talking about the 1 Corinthians 13 love! Ask for it. Pray for it. Thirst for it. Till you get it. You’d need a great dose of love in marriage.

Also, if you do not love that person you want to get married to, no matter the dream and vision you’ve seen, please go to God again and dream better dreams! One of the signs that the Lord is in a relationship is love! You might not have it from the inception but if it doesn’t come during courtship or as your wedding approaches, you might be in the wrong ‘ship’!


Practice being at peace with people now. Quit the angry, shouting, fighting, walking out of people, clapping in the ears, locking the shirts, creating scenes lifestyles! If you don’t stop it, you are taking violence into your home. If as a Christian bride, you cannot bless the man you are married to with peace, erm, you’d probably do him evil and not good all the days of his life.


These include communicating, listening, resolving conflicts constructively, offering assistance etc. Practice with the people you are with! Stop postponing everything till marriage. How good at you at having successful relationships with people? That’s like the mirror of your marriage already. You’d need these skills in marriage.


Selfishness will kill your marriage. Stop thinking about yourself and try putting other people in your shoes! Marriage is all about sacrifices- if you are a selfish lady who only thinks about herself, you will have issues. Don’t go into marriage with a mind that your will must be done, no matter what! Don’t always try to win the arguments also. Those might be pointers that you are selfish. Work on yourself now!


Two people with different personalities, from different backgrounds will have clashes once in a while. When it doesn’t go down well with you, you must be prepared to discuss things, accept apology, take the thoughts out, forgive and continue to love as before as though. nothing happened. Don’t keep the grudges till 2040! Let them go! If you lack a forgiving spirit now, you’d have a long list of records of offences to keep in marriage!


Any skill that comes your way now is a good one to learn. Whatever skill you think will make your family stand out, try to lay your hands on them. Sewing, gardening, baking, juicing, saving, making cleaning products etc. Check the Proverbs 31 woman well and you’d see a woman with blessed hands. Commit your hands to grab a skill there and another there and oh how much beauty it would add to your home.


Marriage is like a school. You learn, unlearn and relearn. You do not know it all! Go into marriage with an open mind to learn. If you think you have nothing to learn from that man, don’t marry him then!

‘Oh, so that’s how you see it? I was wrong! How should I do it next time?’ is a big statement for you to say?

It’s difficult for you to admit mistakes and fails?

You are always right and would do whatever you think is right?

Not good for marriage!


If you don’t have a contented spirit, you will be frustrated in marriage! Quit comparing your life and achievements with others. Let contentment be a virtue you go into marriage with so you don’t start comparing husbands and start running at other people’s paces!


Ah, my dear sister, the One who created marriage knows what He was saying when He commanded wives to submit! If you are still struggling just thinking about this, simply start praying now. You won’t be a successful Christian wife without submitting to and respecting your man as you would the Lord! If you will have problems submitting to that man, do both of you a favor of saying ‘no’ and let him go! Yeah, it’s as serious as that.


The greatest of all! If you have this, all the above will be easier to achieve. Being a godly wife will become simple too. You’d pray for your home, you’d pray for yourself, you’d use prayers to bar the enemies out of your marriage, you’d be guided by the Lord in your decisions and as you obey His Will about a godly marriage, you’d see Him bombarding your marriage with His glory!


There are so many other things that make a Godly marriage beautiful, but I can boldly say that if you enter into marriage with these ten, I am certain it will be a good start. And with the last point I stated which is the RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD, and even TEACHABILITY, I am certain you will adapt fast, get other necessary things and shine in your home.

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